Arkansas Birth Photography

Whew, where do I even begin in this blog?? I just have to start I guess with a disclaimer. This is a raw, emotion filled documentation that covers loss, love and hope. Many of you know Mica because she has shot your Wedding along side me. She is my dependable, talented and beautiful second Wedding shooter, but more than that she is my friend. She and her husband Aaron are the most genuine, loving, kind and faithful people that I know. 

To start from the very beginning of this journey, I think Mica shares things best in her own words....

"Hope. Webster defines hope as a feeling of exception and desire for a certain thing to happen. Hope is written on the pages of The Word to be a giver of joy and fulfiller of promises. Ever since I could remember, I've clung to the hope of being a mother. This has always been one of my greatest desires in life. It's always been an understanding between God and myself that I would receive the desires of my heart. So one could image the elation I felt when I found out that I was pregnant! I just knew that God had something special planned for Aaron and me, but it was nothing like I expected. Sadly, Christmas of 2012 we miscarried at 11 weeks. It was heart wrenching. A plethora of emotions and questions assaulted my spirit and mind, but I still clung to the hope that God would keep his promise to provide a baby for us. As the months went by, we didn't get pregnant. I started to dig into Scripture, desperate for a life line of hope. The life lined ended up being Hebrews 10:23. "Hold fast to the confessions of our HOPE, without wavering, for He who promised is faithful."

Six months later we found out we were pregnant again! Of course the human nature within started to rise up fear and doubt that everything wasn't going to be okay, but I just kept going back to that scripture. I knew God would keep his promise in my spirit, but my mind was  constant struggle that I had to pray out over and over again. September of 2013, and we made it out of the first trimester with a beautiful heartbeat and growing baby. We went into our appointment on September 11th, 14 weeks pregnant to discover that the baby's heartbeat had stopped. My heart stopped. I can't describe the pain that engulfed me at that moment or the confusion and anger that I had toward God. How could this happen again? He promised! Aaron and I cried, sat in silence, talked, got upset together and most importantly, we prayed together. Even though I was drowning and lost in these emotions, Hebrews 10:23 kept popping into my mind and spirit. To strengthen and remind myself of this hope that God promised me, I put scripture all over my house to remind me that God's words brings life, joy and hope.

Shortfly after, in November 2013 we found out we were pregnant once again. We were happy but honestly our joy was muffled with the uncertain possibilities that we might lose this baby as well. I kept repeating to myself to hold on to my hope, without wavering, for God promised. Easier said than felt, but easier to believe in faith when recalling how God has provided in my past so diligently. The battled continue through the first trimester where I was constantly having to buff my armor of God. The middle of January 2014 rolls around and we make it through the first trimester! Anxiety still threatens my heart all the way through the pregnancy, but hope and love deliver me through.

My due date vastly approaching, the ultimate joy was welcomed and overwhelming. I was ecstatic thinking of how I wanted to have Rome naturally--the way God intended, or so I thought. I had everything planned out: work straight up until labor; fight through the contractions as far as possible before going to the hospital; go in and have the baby naturally in hours. I've always known God is in control but He showed me this this labor. Two weeks before my due date I was put on bed rest. On my due date I started to have contractions so much and close together I couldn't sleep. I wasn't dilating so the doctor wanted to wait to see if I naturally started to, and five days later, sleep deprived, I did! Did I see this coming? No! By Sunday morning I was praying for rest and a quick delivery. Everything was progressing and going good as I was dilated to a four and in the hospital. I was so pumped and ecstatic to have this baby that I caught my one hundredth wind and was literally dancing in my hospital room. I thought this was going to go wonderfully!

Hours later, water broke and at a five, no more progress, exhaustion, a lot of pain, and a lot of sickness changed my labor outcome.

 I ended up doing a c-section. Even though this wasn't' my plan, my spirit smiled because God was keeping his promise of delivering my hope and joy that day.

I saw Rome Arthur Bullock at 5:06pm on September 1st, 2014 on Labor Day! When I saw him for the first time, I though and said, "He's beautiful!" In my mind I was thanking God for being faithful to his promises and delivering my hope on this day. 

Hope is the provider of happiness because it gives one something to desire for in life. I just know that through this season in my life I have learned that my hope will always be found in God because he who promised was and is always faithful. "

 There truly aren't words for me to say to wrap this up. I know that Mica and Aaron's story will touch people who have suffered loss, and I know that it will also give them hope. Thank you God, for blessing my sweet friends and for giving this family Rome. He is more than a blessing!